A young female relative telephoned me the other morning to ask whether she had to accept an invitation the wife of her new boss kept pressing on her, and especially whether she had to ask them back. "They're so pompous! Just because I work for him I don't see why I have to see them," she said fretfully."But I just thought I'd ask you. You care so much about etiquette."

"I do not!" I said. "I don't even use that word!" As ever, I was indignant at her harping on the generation gap.

"Well, you know about it," she said.