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scholarship

 


PUBLISHED: December 3, 2020

 

to practice intense study. to research. to seek again. to require confirmation,
a proof.       to believe.       to believe in knowing because it can be said
again and again.       the proving of a theorem.       now the corollary: to have learned 
axioms. to have internalized them in one’s axons. to know on a cellular level. to truth. to 
truthify. to embody theory.       not to be theoretical. to postulate. not to translate wherever 
possible. to hold lemmata in the hand:  leashed  controllable.       to create the       bound 
aries of       to understand the source material       the source text of
to become intimately familiar with the makings of       to understand       to stand
under law       proof in hand       to hypothesize  codify  declaim
missing: complete allegiance to the hierarchy of epistemologies       lines of logic
       ob       je       ct       iv       it       y       as (a) knowable object(s).
instead/and: slippage the rush of senses       other lines etched around the eyes 
       not logic-derived              the inconvenient soft casing of the brain.

I       taught control of the mind and its body       taught the mind belongs to 
the body       is to be used in service of the body    and in this direction only 
enjoy scholarly work. I enjoy convincing myself what is true       because it has 
been assembled before me       or I have deduced it       using numbers and reason. I
 enjoy conjugating: placing the DNA of this epistemology    directly into my cells   
becoming this set of logics.       I climb       the hierarchy of epistemologies. here I 
do not think about the softness of the brain        here I do not contemplate the science 
of neuroplasticity. experience is unreliable/irreproducible       therefore not of use
here I simply receive. I have been gifted with a task       trophied as someone 
else’s proof of ______.              objectively, I exist only in a Cartesian sense.

you, knowledge—not producer—curator, have been given a set of 
postulates. you have been gifted have earned        have achieved 
financial resources with which to access the postulates. you have been 
entrusted. you have received a sort of trust funding. it is trusted that you 
will use it in the service of the State               which funds the University
which does not discuss its source materials which does not discuss its 
resources        its human resources        which is an environment for the 
storage of knowledge        which can be synthesized by the right person or 
persons        which is/are a set of working neurons which do not include 
said persons’ bodies.                      bodies of knowledge notwith
standing.        the ship(s) the scholars’ bodies came in on.   for what 
purpose. a purpose that you have been invited to share        Dear Scholar.
the floating knowledge       knowledge of floating       the scholars at sea –

he/she/it is blackboarded.
he/she/it is presumably intelligent.
he/she/it shines a light.
he/she/it brings to bear.
he/she/it hoists the load.
he/she/it is calloused.
                  is tired.
he/she/it is unspecified.
he/she/it is homeless.
he/she/it has been erased.
                  once loved erasers’
                            hot rubber smell on the finger
                            the way their dead skin rolls between the fingers and away
                  once bled from the head
                                                loved

 

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