Today is a special day here at the VQR offices, one of four each year. We draw inspiration from Steve Martin’s The Jerk:
Navin R. Johnson: The new phone book’s here! The new phone book’s here!
Harry Hartounian: Boy, I wish I could get that excited about nothing.
Navin R. Johnson: Nothing? Are you kidding? Page 73 - Johnson, Navin R.! I’m somebody now! Millions of people look at this book everyday! This is the kind of spontaneous publicity - your name in print - that makes people. I’m in print! Things are going to start happening to me now.
Yes, one hundred copies of the Fall issue have just arrived by truck. That’s our in-house allotment of the thousands that will soon be winging their way to subscribers around the world. They’ve all got that new VQR scent. (Which is sort of like new car smell, only less cancer-y.) We’ll each pore over the pages, obsessively IDing every little mistake that we let slip through, as a form of self-flagellation. You can play along at home, too.
Expect your copy in the mail shortly, and for all of the articles to be on the website in about a week. Unless you’re not a subscriber, in which case, get on it – our rates are about to go up, since they’re pegged to both inflation and awesomeness.